[Much as Felix wants to delay having to meet Dimitri's eye, it's a little unavoidable when he wants a bite of that food and when he's a little curious himself. Not that he'd admit to the latter. No way in Seiros' name.
Felix is thankfully casual enough when he bites in, though not without some takeaways from that experience as he casts his gaze away once more, chewing thoughtfully. There's no imagining it. Dimitri is pink... from exertion, perhaps? It sounds like he's been worrying about him for quite sometime though, is he coming down with something due to that?]
...Don't push yourself too hard, [Felix says quietly as guilt tugs at his heartstrings and has him curling his fingers into the sheets.]
[Felix is so incredibly off the mark that Dimitri just ends up looking at him, bewildered. In what way is lifting a fork pushing himself? He tilts his head to the side, eyes wide.]
[His face isn't that red! Dimitri lifts a hand to cover his mouth, feeling his cheeks while he's at it. They are pretty warm... with his gaze trained on the ground, he mumbles:]
Feeding someone that isn't a child just feels... intimate.
[That is the last answer Felix expected to hear, and it's one that has him coloring in a similar manner as Dimitri.]
What's that supposed to mean?!
[Felix's upper arm twitches once he realizes what he just said, but he manages to resist the urge to lift his hand to his mouth. So he just settles for casting his gaze downwards.]
It's... just me, [he says under his breath. There's nothing to get worked up over, yet Dimitri is here, blushing like he saw a lady naked in the bath.]
However, the words don't make it out of Felix's mouth. Not because an unseen force was stopping him, but out of his own volition. Why indeed is Dimitri bothered by this, if it's nothing to fuss over? The question begs an answer, one that Felix has considered since that night they've shared a bed together.
But it can't be the case. Because there's no way in Fodlan that Dimitri would be in love with him. Not when he walked away from Felix that night on the bridge like none of his words mattered at all and chose his ghosts over him and the living.
Felix swallows, closing his eyes briefly as he breathes to calm the sting that comes with the memory.]
Yeah, it's nothing at all, [he says, voice tight as he glances towards the bedside table, fingers curled into his palm.]
[For a moment, it seems as if Felix is about to figure it out. Dimitri's heart hammers in his chest, and he can feel himself starting to sweat. Blessedly, Felix either doesn't get it after all or chooses to have mercy on him. Dimitri takes a deep breath as well, exhaling some of his anxiety. He holds the fork out to Felix again, forgetting to use his other hand to contain any potential mess.]
Does the food suit your tastes? Professor Manuela discouraged the use of too many spices, but I did ask for some extra seasoning.
[The goddess is merciful and allows Felix the grace of not crying this time around. However, relief does have its consequences, and by the time Felix notices that Dimitri forgot to use his hand to catch any mess he might make, it's far too late.]
It's good, [Felix says, frowning slightly at the sauce dribbling down his chin. What a way to feel like he was six again...]
[What a stupid mistake...! Dimitri puts down the fork and reaches out, swiping his thumb over the mess. But he hesitates once the pad brushes against Felix's lower lip, lingering there, horribly tempted to just pop his thumb into his mouth and see if Felix licks it off. Brief though the fantasy may be, it paralyzes him all the same, leaving him staring at the place where their skin touches.]
[Dimitri is pausing by his lower lip--why is he pausing? Felix lifts his gaze slightly to meet Dimitri's, a question in his furrowed brows.
Dimitri responds like a deer caught in the path of a hunter, but he doesn't pull away still. But the scariest part, perhaps, is how Felix's heart skips a beat when they lock eyes in that manner. Or maybe it's the way he realizes that he doesn't want Dimitri to let go, and parts his lips slightly in response to that, waiting for Dimitri to close that minute gap between them and seal his lips over his--
Wait, what?
Eyes widening in horror for a moment, Felix tears himself away from Dimitri's hand, eyes fixed on the cabinet across him as red paints his cheeks the way they did earlier.]
[Something crackles in the air between them, something that has Dimitri starting to lean in the moment when Felix jerks away. He wanted to kiss Felix, and... Felix probably knew. There really isn't any way to play it off, so he doesn't even try. Dimitri sits back again, wiping his thumb clean on the napkin.]
I'll be more careful, [he says quietly, spearing another bite. Even if he can't pretend that was nothing, he can at least move past it. This time, he holds his other hand beneath it properly as he holds the fork up to Felix's lips.]
[Felix doesn't want Dimitri to be more careful, but no. He can never say that out loud, not even when this Dimitri, by the looks of it, seems to reciprocate something that Felix had long suppressed in favor of atonement.
He has no right. Felix has no right to love Dimitri in this manner, not when he has yet to properly make up for his mistake of realizing everything when it's too late. Not when everything hangs in a too precarious balance that will surely topple over if he were to consider something so outlandish.
Is what one side of Felix says. Another wonders what's too bad about wandering down that road, and of the potential of saving Dimitri if he decided to just love him earlier instead of pushing him away like he did in the past...
...No, that's just him being selfish, and Felix, realizing that Dimitri has been holding out that bite for him for quite a while, turns his head to take it, chewing in silence as he keeps his gaze lowered, not wishing to meet Dimitri's eye.]
[Though things are horribly awkward, Felix seems to be willing to move past it, accepting the food without comment. Grateful he's not just telling him to get out, Dimitri feeds him in silence until he's had his fill, managing to look calm again by the time he's done.]
I suppose that just leaves the concoction. Are you ready for it?
[As he'll ever be. Felix tries not to scowl at the vial, knowing that Dimitri is just doing his job here, but these potions are never pleasant to take.]
[As soon as Felix complies, Dimitri leans in, holding the vial to his lips and carefully tipping it forward. He can't help but stare — Felix here with his head tilted back, lips pursed...
[Felix gulps down that liquid, determined to get this unpleasant task out of the way as fast as he can. He scrunches his eyes close midway, grimacing slightly as he polishes off that vial, opening them only once he's finished it off.]
...This blows, [Felix says, sighing as he lays back slightly, none too pleased about the prospect of being stuck here for a few more days. This day was boring enough as it is after all.]
Being stuck in bed is quite unpleasant, [Dimitri agrees, sitting back and placing the empty vial on the tray.]
I mostly used the time to get in some extra study, but I suppose that is not an option for you... though hopefully, Professor Manuela will clear you to use your arms again soon.
[Sheepishly, he smiles.]
I wish I were better at entertaining. You must be frightfully bored.
[Their role is to live and inspire, the former of which is what a Fraldarius is born for. This particular Fraldarius, like the previous generation, has failed so in its task. Walked around as a shield without a purpose, until it found itself with a second chance at... what exactly, Felix does not know, but there are things he dares not repeat with this opportunity presented to him.]
Anyway, like you said, I should be able to use more of my arms soon.
[Like push away a certain prince. How long has it been since they've had a casual conversation like this...?]
I suppose. Though, I really do wish you three at least would not treat me as such.
[It's preferable to being "boar", he supposes, though if their continued estrangement could have somehow prevented Felix from getting injured like this, he would have easily chosen to remain that way. Dimitri curls his fingers around the hem of his jacket.]
It may not be the duty of a prince, but as a friend...
[Trailing off, he fixes his gaze on the tray. Honestly, he doesn't even know if Felix sees him as a friend again!]
[Dimitri absolutely beams. It takes years off his face, even if only for a few moments. Naturally, he's listening very closely for anything Felix might have to say after that roundabout confirmation, and though Felix says it quietly, he picks up his gentle chastisement.]
I will try. It is somewhat difficult, admittedly... there is much to be done and not enough time to do it in.
[Yet here he is, just sitting with Felix, doing nothing at all. It's telling.]
[It probably is funny coming from Felix, considering he's the one in an infirmary bed right now, but the fact that Dimitri doesn't call him out on the irony of it has him sinking back into the pillows in relief.]
...You're an idiot. Why are you still here with me, then?
[The severity of his words is perhaps undermined by the subtle upwards twitch of the corner of his mouth, not exactly minding how much... younger Dimitri looks now. Kind of like a small puppy eager for attention, if he were to put a finger to it...]
[Felix almost smiled, didn't he? Dimitri presses his lips together to keep himself from chuckling, not wanting to spoil his mood.]
Because I care about you, of course. You are very dear to me, Felix.
[What an embarrassing thing to say...! But it's the truth and it always has been, long before any sort of romantic attraction came into play. So Dimitri doesn't try to qualify the statement despite turning a little pink again.]
It's for my own peace of mind, too. Seeing you alert again is incredibly relieving.
[What a pair they make. Felix can't help but marvel at how warm he's getting from that simple admission, wondering where all this heat is coming from.]
...Enough to help you sleep tonight?
[Because that feels like a concern with Dimitri all the time.]
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amewsbox2020-01-09 12:53 pm
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Felix is thankfully casual enough when he bites in, though not without some takeaways from that experience as he casts his gaze away once more, chewing thoughtfully. There's no imagining it. Dimitri is pink... from exertion, perhaps? It sounds like he's been worrying about him for quite sometime though, is he coming down with something due to that?]
...Don't push yourself too hard, [Felix says quietly as guilt tugs at his heartstrings and has him curling his fingers into the sheets.]
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Push myself...?
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You're... red in the face. You should check with Professor Manuela to make sure you're not going down with something.
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[His face isn't that red! Dimitri lifts a hand to cover his mouth, feeling his cheeks while he's at it. They are pretty warm... with his gaze trained on the ground, he mumbles:]
Feeding someone that isn't a child just feels... intimate.
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What's that supposed to mean?!
[Felix's upper arm twitches once he realizes what he just said, but he manages to resist the urge to lift his hand to his mouth. So he just settles for casting his gaze downwards.]
It's... just me, [he says under his breath. There's nothing to get worked up over, yet Dimitri is here, blushing like he saw a lady naked in the bath.]
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[Ah, that came out too high pitched. Dimitri clears his throat, spearing another bite for Felix.]
I know that. That is why I did not say anything. It isn't anything to fuss over.
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[...you are.
However, the words don't make it out of Felix's mouth. Not because an unseen force was stopping him, but out of his own volition. Why indeed is Dimitri bothered by this, if it's nothing to fuss over? The question begs an answer, one that Felix has considered since that night they've shared a bed together.
But it can't be the case. Because there's no way in Fodlan that Dimitri would be in love with him. Not when he walked away from Felix that night on the bridge like none of his words mattered at all and chose his ghosts over him and the living.
Felix swallows, closing his eyes briefly as he breathes to calm the sting that comes with the memory.]
Yeah, it's nothing at all, [he says, voice tight as he glances towards the bedside table, fingers curled into his palm.]
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Does the food suit your tastes? Professor Manuela discouraged the use of too many spices, but I did ask for some extra seasoning.
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It's good, [Felix says, frowning slightly at the sauce dribbling down his chin. What a way to feel like he was six again...]
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[What a stupid mistake...! Dimitri puts down the fork and reaches out, swiping his thumb over the mess. But he hesitates once the pad brushes against Felix's lower lip, lingering there, horribly tempted to just pop his thumb into his mouth and see if Felix licks it off. Brief though the fantasy may be, it paralyzes him all the same, leaving him staring at the place where their skin touches.]
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Dimitri responds like a deer caught in the path of a hunter, but he doesn't pull away still. But the scariest part, perhaps, is how Felix's heart skips a beat when they lock eyes in that manner. Or maybe it's the way he realizes that he doesn't want Dimitri to let go, and parts his lips slightly in response to that, waiting for Dimitri to close that minute gap between them and seal his lips over his--
Wait, what?
Eyes widening in horror for a moment, Felix tears himself away from Dimitri's hand, eyes fixed on the cabinet across him as red paints his cheeks the way they did earlier.]
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I'll be more careful, [he says quietly, spearing another bite. Even if he can't pretend that was nothing, he can at least move past it. This time, he holds his other hand beneath it properly as he holds the fork up to Felix's lips.]
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He has no right. Felix has no right to love Dimitri in this manner, not when he has yet to properly make up for his mistake of realizing everything when it's too late. Not when everything hangs in a too precarious balance that will surely topple over if he were to consider something so outlandish.
Is what one side of Felix says. Another wonders what's too bad about wandering down that road, and of the potential of saving Dimitri if he decided to just love him earlier instead of pushing him away like he did in the past...
...No, that's just him being selfish, and Felix, realizing that Dimitri has been holding out that bite for him for quite a while, turns his head to take it, chewing in silence as he keeps his gaze lowered, not wishing to meet Dimitri's eye.]
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I suppose that just leaves the concoction. Are you ready for it?
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[As he'll ever be. Felix tries not to scowl at the vial, knowing that Dimitri is just doing his job here, but these potions are never pleasant to take.]
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[As soon as Felix complies, Dimitri leans in, holding the vial to his lips and carefully tipping it forward. He can't help but stare — Felix here with his head tilted back, lips pursed...
Well, he's not getting any sleep tonight.]
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...This blows, [Felix says, sighing as he lays back slightly, none too pleased about the prospect of being stuck here for a few more days. This day was boring enough as it is after all.]
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I mostly used the time to get in some extra study, but I suppose that is not an option for you... though hopefully, Professor Manuela will clear you to use your arms again soon.
[Sheepishly, he smiles.]
I wish I were better at entertaining. You must be frightfully bored.
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That's not the job of a prince.
[Their role is to live and inspire, the former of which is what a Fraldarius is born for. This particular Fraldarius, like the previous generation, has failed so in its task. Walked around as a shield without a purpose, until it found itself with a second chance at... what exactly, Felix does not know, but there are things he dares not repeat with this opportunity presented to him.]
Anyway, like you said, I should be able to use more of my arms soon.
[Like push away a certain prince. How long has it been since they've had a casual conversation like this...?]
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[It's preferable to being "boar", he supposes, though if their continued estrangement could have somehow prevented Felix from getting injured like this, he would have easily chosen to remain that way. Dimitri curls his fingers around the hem of his jacket.]
It may not be the duty of a prince, but as a friend...
[Trailing off, he fixes his gaze on the tray. Honestly, he doesn't even know if Felix sees him as a friend again!]
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...Just don't give me any headaches.
[Well, that's neither a yes or a no, but maybe it's enough to deflect from the heat warming his cheeks once more.]
Take better care of yourself, [Felix mumbles, unsure if he wants Dimitri to hear him say such things.]
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I will try. It is somewhat difficult, admittedly... there is much to be done and not enough time to do it in.
[Yet here he is, just sitting with Felix, doing nothing at all. It's telling.]
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...You're an idiot. Why are you still here with me, then?
[The severity of his words is perhaps undermined by the subtle upwards twitch of the corner of his mouth, not exactly minding how much... younger Dimitri looks now. Kind of like a small puppy eager for attention, if he were to put a finger to it...]
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Because I care about you, of course. You are very dear to me, Felix.
[What an embarrassing thing to say...! But it's the truth and it always has been, long before any sort of romantic attraction came into play. So Dimitri doesn't try to qualify the statement despite turning a little pink again.]
It's for my own peace of mind, too. Seeing you alert again is incredibly relieving.
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...Enough to help you sleep tonight?
[Because that feels like a concern with Dimitri all the time.]
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